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April Travel & Events February Travel & Events Dec. Referral Contest LoveVoodoo Fest Review |
Naughty in N'awlins 2011 Review July 5 - 10, 2011 Elena and I just returned from Naughty in Nawlins. We had the time of our lives! The “Who's who” of the Lifestyle industry were all in attendance with us. In addition to LoveVoodoo and LoveVoodoo Travel, the owners of SwingLifestyle (SLS), Lifestyle Lounge (LL), Kasidie, Castaways Travel, SDC, Toms Trips, Dream Pleasure Tours, The Couples Cruise, Freedom Acres, Tabu and Collette were represented. Also in attendance were representatives from Hedonism, Caliente in Tampa, and Caliente Caribe. If a bomb had dropped on New Orleans, the entire Lifestyle industry would have collapsed! Wednesday Night  The first night was a Swingers Parade sponsored by SwingLifestyle. I met the owner the first day and he turned out to be a great guy. I spent a lot of time chatting with him over the next several days. The parade went right up Bourbon Street, complete with a full brass band and a police escort! No your eyes are not deceiving you, a SWINGERS PARADE with floats beads and boobs, in a major U.S. city! Amazing!
Were the local New Orleanians offended by the Swingers? Unless flashing the parade and hanging out of their balconies yelling is how they show their displeasure, I think they were OK with it! Did the organizers get some local high school band to lead the parade? NO. The organizers Bob & Tess got the God Damn Treme Brass Band! One of the oldest and most famous bands in New Orleans. They blew it up! The parade went up Bourbon street, to Canal street, and ended at Colette. 600+ people in one swingers club so as you can imagine it was a WILD night. The place was packed and it took us a while to walk around and check out all the rooms. We love Colette and visit every time we are in New Orleans, but we've never seen this many people inside. The Treme Brass band had another gig at a cool local club called The Candlelight Lounge following the parade. After Elena and I got our party on at Colette, weand a few others headed over to The Candlelight to catch up with the band. What a great place! It is as big as my garage, with a hundred people packed in it, listening to a full on brass band, drinking dancing and partying! They even had free butterbeans and ham hocks! Outside they were grillin’ up sausages (best I have ever had) and burgers. We had a great time for an hour or so, then the rest of the night was a blur! Thursday Morning I woke up with a bottle of Excedrin in my hand, a hot naked lady beside me (My wife!) and clothes strewn about the room! I jumped out of bed (actually, I didn’t jump, I crawled) and got into the shower. There was no time to sleep; today was LoveVoodoo's Day at Naughty in Nawlins! We started the day by meeting some friends for lunch at Oceana, they have these CRAZY good charbroiled oysters with this insane parmesan & garlic sauce. There were some seminars on flogging, Tantra, etc. going on at the hotel, but Elena and I decided to walk around and check out the local scene. I heard a sousaphone coming from two blocks away. Then I could see them comin! Two motorcycle cops, 4 steppers, a brass band, followed by parade of about 30 people. They were throwing beads and dancing. The crazy thing is this was no huge celebration, it was just some kids birthday! That’s how they do it down there! After all the wild daytime parties, we started the evening with a Meet & Greet at the Jeremy Davenport lounge located in the Ritz Carlton. They have KILLER French martinis. I must admit I was a little nervous hosting a bunch of drunk swingers at the Ritz; however, after one, two, or five French Martinis, I relaxed! Jeremy Davenport and his band were AWESOME! After a couple of hours, many drinks, and a young lady (I will not mention her name…..SUSAN!) doing a dance that made the staff rush to get defibrillators for the older people in the audience, I realized it was time to go back to our hotel!  Back at the Crown Plaza, they were set up and ready for that night’s party. Bob & Tess were adamant that I was on time for the show! I mean they bugged me all week "Todd you have to be here on time! Don’t be late". Why were they so adamant? Well a couple of minutes after the music started a Midget (Is midget politically correct? If not, my apologies) came running in wearing a cowboy hat and break dancing. This dude spun on his head like a dradle during Hanukkah. He did the worm, climbed the pole, it was crazy!
{ pause and jump forward to the next day, I am standing on the balcony with a dozen other people when an middle aged attractive lady bursts in and says "So, I fucked the midget last night! and he was really good.” Then she goes on to describe how he was hung and what they did. The really crazy thing is no one seemed especially shocked…Ok back to the story}.  If that was not enough Bob had hired the Wild Magnolias which is a Mardi Gras Indian tribe with a KILLER band. These guys tore it up, and are one the premier groups in New Orleans. They typically only play big venues like Jazz Fest, so this was a big deal. If you are not familiar with Mardi Gras Indians they have a history that is older than the United States its self. It’s a shame they did not teach us about them in African American history class in school.
We were dancing and drinking so much the next day I could hardly walk because my legs hurt so bad! Hold on, that was not the end. Elena and I took several of the guests along with some people from Swinglifestyle and Topples Travel over to see Kermit Ruffins at Vaughns in the Treme area of New Orleans. Some of the people I took had told me "I don’t like Jazz". I was like, "Just wait until you go to Vaughn's and see Kermit”. On a side note, I love Kermit Ruffins. He is a what New Orleans music is all about. If you have an opportunity check him out on YouTube, he is also one of the featured characters in the HBO series Treme.  Vaughn's is a little hole in the wall bar, no A/C, hot as hell, cheap drinks, with 200 people packed in dancing, drinking and partying. (by now you should start to see a theme for our trip to New Orleans!) The same people that "Didn’t like Jazz" where now dancing like there was no tomorrow! In addition to the GREAT atmosphere, cheap drinks and killer music, they even had free, yes FREE red beans and rice, which were the best I have ever had. At some point around 3 or 4 we got a cab, stumbled into the hotel, crawled to our rooms and started looking for the Excedrin bottle from the night before
Friday Morning Friday we got up first thing in the morning (which in N'awlins is 11:00 am!). We went to The Royal House on the corner of St. Louis and Royal Streets. We had this great Chicken & Sausage Gumbo and a spinach salad with blackened Scallops! I also ordered 6 oysters. The chef told me he gave me a little "lagniappe" (pronounced Lan-yap) Which turns out to mean "A little more". I assume he did this because he wanted a little "lagniappe" in his tip! Turns out New Orleans is all about lagniappe; they give you a little more than you expect, and assume you will return the favor! This is how it was where I grew up in the suburbs of DC, so I get it. When I asked him if I could use that term when referring to sex, for example, "Honey, if you go back to my room with me, I'll give you a little lagniappe", I thought he was going to fall out of his chair. He laughed for 10 min, then scratched his chin and said in a thick N’awlins accent "Yeah…you could say that". We then went off to some of the Naughty in N’awlins parties at the hottest clubs on Bourbon St. Toms Trips and Hedonism were hosting a Ms. No Swim Suit contest that was out of this world! The staff at the club just stood there with their jaws dropped, and that is saying something considering they have seen a lot! Friday Night  Everyone went to the Party Erotique sponsored by Naughty in Nawlins, SDC, and Caliente. To mix things up a bit this event was an erotic stage show, with some pretty cool electronic music. There must have been 1,000 people there and 999 of them had on Naughty in Nawlins badges! Bob & Tess really made this event successful.
Elena and I blew out of there a little early to meet…Well, Elena won't let me tell you what happened the rest of the night. Just like Hedonism, what happens in N’awlins stays in N’awlins. I will tell you the next morning when I was looking for the Excedrin I found a few garments that were not ours! Saturday The day time parties continued, which were off the chain! 900 swingers & alcohol! I am sure you can use your imagination. The night time party was sponsored by our friends at Lifestyle Lounge. They were celebrating the 10 year anniversary of their web site. We certainly appreciate more than most how hard it is to run a site for that long. The theme was Angels and Devils, the costumes and décor were awesome. Bob & Tess brought in a huge ice sculpture of a nude lady where you poured shots in the top and they came out of her who-ha! Very cool! They had a great DJ that spun all the latest tunes and some I had never heard before. By about 11pm the tequila shots where numbing my sore legs, so I got out there and danced my ass off! The whole time I was dancing Elena was sitting with one of the owners of LL talking about computer code…… Really, they were talking about the differences between .net and .asp. I couldn’t believe it. So I grabbed the both of them and dragged them into the party! I mean really! Talking about programming while there are drinks to be consumed, and people to… well…. Get to know! Crazy. We decided to check out the "Party Floor" (which we had yet to check out) and we headed upstairs. When we got to the party floor, we were turned back, because we didn't have the correct attire (apparrently you had to be in underwear, a robe or lingerie to be on this floor and we were still in our "street clothes"). We were just about to head out when we ran into Tess. Because she is really the one in charge (don't let Bob try to fool you), she was able to give us a quick tour (even thou we weren't dressed correctly). She took us into a beautiful room that looked more like a harum than any party rooms we've seen. Normally, when we go to hotel parties, the party rooms are just regular hotel rooms with a few people playing and everyone else standing around. Not at Naughty in N'awlins! We have been on this floor before, but Bob's team really outdid themselves and created an entire floor full of fully decorated room after room with different decode, sexy music and e rooms even smelled great. The Dungeons were awesome and the orgy room was packed (they had 10 king sized beds in the group room pushed together!). I won't even go into the Dark Room or the Chocolate Room... But they weren't serving Chocolate martinis... Anyway, it was great for Tess to take a minute to give us a tour and once again it was a great night. I am sure something wild happened later because I had two hickies and my back hurt, but I can't remember! Sunday  The event ended on Sunday, and there were a lot of sad faces in the lobby. We were able to stayuntil Monday and ended up hanging out with a couple we thought we knew. We went to Frenchman street to the Blue Nile to see the TBA Brass band. This was a killer band, they had two bass drums and two Sousaphones. My ears were ringing for two days! The couple was the same couple that "Didn’t like jazz". This was great band that played everything from traditional New Orleans songs, to the Rolling Stones and Nirvana.
Around midnight we headed over to Howlin Wolf to see the Hot 8 Brass band. (Check out the Hot 8 on YouTube, they do a great version on sexual Healing). By then end of the night the couple we were hanging with could not wait to come back, and I guarantee next time someone uses Kenny G and Jazz in the same sentences they will set them straight! We actually got to "know" this couple, who we had known for 4 or 5 years along with a few other people much better, and they became friends rather than acquaintances. We met other web sites that we considered "competition" and realized that they were actually just regular folks like us, and enjoyed getting to know them. I mention this because that is what Naughty in N’awlins is all about to Elena and I. There is certainly the sex, parties, drinking, food and music, but in the end it's all about making friends and memories that will last much longer than the event! If you were there, you get it, if you didn’t... you missed out! To book next year's Naughty in Nawlins go to www.LoveVoodooTravel.com Damn! I forgot the mention the Mechanical Bull and The Big Foot that turned into a Stripper! Oh well, you will just have to come and see for yourself! |
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